I divorced my ex-husband after years of emotional and physical abuse and have since gotten remarried. My 15 year old daughter chose to live ...

Question

I divorced my ex-husband after years of emotional and physical abuse and have since gotten remarried. My 15 year old daughter chose to live with him in a different state. I have also moved to a different state and my daughter has not visited me since the divorce( 1 year and 3 months). Before the divorce, we were separated for two years ,at which time our daughter resided with me. My ex husband has spoken badly about my husband and I and my daughter does not want to visit me at my home. My husband and I have had restraining orders against my ex for threats and harassing text messages, which I still have. My husband and I are both mental health counselors for children and know my ex husband is using my daughter to punish me for leaving him. I attended and completed the parenting classes required by the state of NJ where as my ex did not. My question is where do I file for visitation/custody, where I reside now, where they reside, or where the divorce action took place? I would like a court appointed advocate or social worker to talk to my daughter as she will not tell me why she does not want to visit. I was planning for her to visit for the holidays but she went to Florida to visit her cousins instead after I told my ex I did not want her to visit Florida until we came up with a plan for her to visit with me. He bought her a plane ticket and sent her regardless. I am tired and at the point of giving up. PS the divorce took place in NJ. I now reside in VA and they reside in NY.

Thank You.

Answer

If your divorce decree incorporates provisions for custody/visitation,

then this decree could be what's termed domesticated, i.e., registered

in the appropriate court in New York as a decree of that court which could

then be followed by enforcement action(s).

However, if there is no current order governing custody/visitation, then

you could directly file your petition seeking a court order for these issues in the appropriate New York court in the locality where your daughter currently resides.

In either circumstance, you would be well advised to retain a local attorney

to represent you who is knowledgeable and experienced in handling such matters in the courts of the state of New York (in my opinion).